Happy Weekend

 


I'm gonna try to enjoy the rest of my weekend now, meeting friends, last minute christmas shopping and some script reading (for the school application).

ALWAYS REMEMBER: "You got this Felix, keep fighting towards your goals and you'll get there - Whenever you feel like quitting remember why you started"

Resumé 2015

I just finished the last show of the season (The children's theater), and I feel really good about it. It's been exhausting but SUPER FUN! The time has gone by so fast, it's hard to comprehend. I'm looking at my resume right now and realise I've done more than it feels like. Both acting wise, directing wise and writing wise, which it pretty cool. 

Acting/theater:

- Sagogården

- SabelSara and the secret treasure

- The little ghost Godfrey

- Nassjo Against Cancer

- LasseMajas Detektivbyrå 

Acting/Film:

- Inga Lindström

Acting/YouTube:

- Smash

- Paperbag

- Behind the Mask

- A Friend

Directing Theater:

- Scooby-Doo the Hotel

- Shrek

- Sagogården

- SabelSara and the secret treasure

- The little ghost Godfrey

- Super Charlie and the Candy-monster

- LasseMajas Detektivbyrå

Writing: 

- Scooby-Doo the Hotel

- Shrek

- The little ghost Godfrey

- Super Charlie and the Candy-monster

- LasseMajas Detektivbyrå

- A magical night

- Nassjo Agains Cancer (1 skit)
(for the names like Shrek or scooby-doo - I've interpreted the already existent plays/Films, and used only the characters and made up a whole new story)

Looking at it like this, makes me question myself how I managed to do it and with a low salary... (I just love acting too much to care about money, I just wish I could keep doing this for the rest of my life and not have to think "will I survive this month"). I definitely feel like I've developed some new skills (but I can still learn more and get a lot better) and learnt a lot during this year. I'm really look forward to see what 2016 will bring to the table, hopefully a spot in the acting school I'm going to apply to or some bigger bigs. 

This is not all that I've done though, I've been to 3 auditions (that's not much, I want to go to a lot more) and I've recorded 5-7 audition tapes. Still feel like I could have done better in this game, but I live so far away from where they offer auditions, so I would have been broke if I'd gone to more auditions. 

Fingers crossed for 2016,

over and out! 

Russel Wilson quote

Found this a few weeks ago, and I just find this very accurate, and it fits almost every situation, especially in the acting industry! 

And if you didn't know this, I'm a huge fan of football (Seattle Seahawks) and Russel Wilson (the Quarterback) hi's a legend! 

Over and out! 

Can't relax

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas... (not really, even though it's frost and freezing outside, it's more like fall). I'm excited for Christmas, but I feel like I can't relax. I feel like I have so much left to do, but I can't do anything about it. I'm waiting to receive 2 books with monologues and scripts so I can pick  and prepare a monologue for the acting program I'm applying for next year(hopefully that shows up tomorrow or...). 

Working with teenagers that doesn't show respect and who isn't as serious as I am when it comes to acting, makes me so annoyed and stressed out, and with a show coming up next week I don't know what to do... I feel like it's been to much for me to deal with on my own, they're not showing up they don't know their lines (GOD I wish I could yell at them and tell them to step up their game, but I'm to tired and exhausted to deal with that as well). I'll do my best to make this a great ending to the season though, I know my character and lines, but with everything happening, I'm not gonna lie I get affected. I alos work extra as an supply teacher, really enjoy that so hopefully I can continue doing that as well.

I'm just gonna put this out there, I think I'm depressed... My mood is like a rollercoaster and I'm tired all the time, sometimes I just want to cry, and I feel like I'm not doing enough. I need someone to  tell me "you can do this, that'll help you get into the business", but I know that won't happen, so I procrastinate, which makes me feel anxious. I'm all over the place, and I can't talk to anyone because everyone have their own problems to deal with... I just wish I got lucky and booked a really big acting gig, and could work for hours and hours on set and stay happy for the rest of my life, but it's never that easy. 

I pray to god I'll get accepted to the acting school, so I can get my life back on track, and one step closer to my goal of becoming a full-time actor. 
I just had to get things out there, and that's why I started this blog in the beginning, to share what's on my mind and share my acting experience. 

only 11 days left to Christmas! 

P.s forgot to update the blog after the big show last month, so here  are some pictures from the show, we raised almost 400K sek to the breast cancer fond which is unbelievable!! 

HAPPY HALLOWEEN

Halloween is already over, my favourite holiday.. Well I had such a great time with friends (could do this every weekend). 

Upcoming week is such a busy week, with a lot of preparations for the big show on Saturday November the 7th. I'm gonna keep away from everything that can be a distraction (this meaning, the internet and social media. Will I make it? I have to.). This was why I sat down to write a little blog post. Internet, family and friends can be too much sometimes, especially when you're working on a character like "the man" I'm playing (the one I've been writing about in previous blog posts). I just want to be 100% focused so I hope people will respect that. When I try to explain why I do it they don't quite understand. Will I donut judge them, it's a whole new world for them if they're not into acting. 

Anyway, gonna go to bed now maybe watch a film and fall a sleep. Have a great Sunday evening (whoever reading this)

We're getting closer

This is Me, Marie and Sofia and together we're telling an amazing story - about a  young man who has just received the “bad new”... that he has cancer (based on a true story).

We're getting closer and closer to the big day and Premier, with only 2 weeks to go we are rehearsing like never before, and it really starts to show progress (would be sad if it didn't). This young man (portraid by me) is such a fighter, maybe not when we first meet him but as the journey goes on he gets stronger and stronger with the help of both these lovely women. I've been struggling so much with his emotions but I've realised it's because he is in such emotional state and doesn't really know what to think or feel, he is so confused and scared. I feel so strongly for this character and I'm happy I get to portray him and tell his story. The show will be filmed, so expect to see it here on my blog.

Have a great Saturday!  

Being a normal guy

I started my day by playing stupid games on my phone (but seriously, they make me so relaxed and sometimes I feel like I need to treat myself and let myself be a normal guy and play games. I do really love games.) Then I went up to make myself some breakfast and coffee and watched American Horror Story: Hotel episode 2 (which was amazing) and now I'm writing this. 

I did some shopping (lets see now, I think it was Tuesday) two days ago, because It's been ages since I bought new cloth, probably 2-3 months ago. I used to buy new cloth every month, I guess the guy inside me is finally approaching, living with a sister and a mother, it's easy to take after what they're doing, especially if you're like me an actor, always on the watch, trying to get as much information about the society and people as you can (for later use in your work).  Well, It's nice to get some fresh new cloth (love the smell and the feeling). I don't really have the economy for it, but hopefully I get the job I applied for, or something else... I've got plans to start my own business, which I really think can work (fingers krossed).

I have rehearsal today so I'm gonna do the best I can to be as prepared and in character as I can. I've been struggling, because my co-actor's characters are so witty and fucking hilarious (and I love that stuff, my humour) so I can't keep myself from laughing. When I shouldn't laugh at all, because my character is in such deep depression and so sad and confused. I really need to find the concentration and bite me in the tongue. Stick around for an update on how it went. 

Have a great day (it's almost Halloween) 

BOOKS

I just finished reading "The Psychopath Test" (a brilliant book by Jon Ronson, YOU GOTTA read it!) and now I finished reading Username: Evie by Joe Sugg (also brilliant). 

I love when you can see the writer inside your head by just reading a book, I guess I know him too well from watching his videos. Or maybe it's just something about the Sugg's in general, because I felt the same way when I read Zoe Suggs book "Girl online". I don't know many people probably wouldn't agree with me, unless they're watching their videos. Everything they stand for is revealed in their books, which is why I loved both of their books. (omg I sound like a book nerd, maybe I am? I don't know, I just find reading very relaxing recently, and it helps with my vocabulary, and my acting) 

With that said, I'm now moving on to the next read, which is the script for "The Cancer Gala" I'm currently working on. I pretty much know my lines, and my character, there are just a few questions that need to be answered. 

Have a great Sunday!! 

Searching for the right emotion

Been watching the Perks of being a wallflower to find the right emotion for when my character have survived Cancer. (That's an odd choice of movie you might think? Well, it's not)
First of all, I cry like a baby every time I watch it, mostly because Charlie is such a relatable character and partly because Emma and Logan is doing such a great job on showing us the emotional part of the story with their silent, and still faces (you know what I mean, it's so natural). Anyway, I really think I got it (the emotion I was talking about) Logan who plays Charlie is giving me the exact feeling I've been looking for, towards the end when he gets out of the hospital that's the feeling I need. 

You gotta realise that no matter how sad your story might be there is always little light in there, and that's what I want to express towards the end of my scene in the Cancer Gala. 

With that said, I can finally say how much I love this film again. It's without hesitation my favourite film ever, don't know if that's bad or good, 'cause it's such a serious and sad story. But at the same time happy. I JUST LOVE IT. 

"We accept the love we think we deserve" 

Radio Interview P4

I just got home from the radio interview. And it was epic (I'm in part 2,)
I'm so excited about everything that is going on, I don't know where to turn or what to do or where to be. I just gotta try to focus, and do one thing at the time. I have rehearsals later on today and tomorrow and then 2 shows on Saturday and a meeting on Sunday. God what am I doing (I love this, I make it sound like I don't, but I really am enjoying this) 

If you're from Sweden, or know the language, go ahead and listen! My Part begins at 03:19:10.

Think again

The leaves are changing color and the fresh breeze tells me it's officially autumn (I like fall, but I can't stand winter)!

I've been feeling annoyed, tired and angry the whole week, there is definitely something going on, either it's because I know the winter is coming, or because I only got to be on set for one day and is already missing it or it's depression (or a mix of everything)...

I'm trying to keep up with my craft and I'm currently working on my character for the new play, reading, writing and digging (I love it so much). But It doesn't feel right (I'm not talking about the story, character or the project now, I mean the way the producers handle these projects)... It annoys the crap out of me, people want us (non A-list actors) to work for free...but then still there is a market for it (and there is money) and people keep asking for movies and theater to come out but they're not willing to pay for it!? I do NOT understand! I'm lucky to get payed (doesn't pay all the bills, but it helps, and I love acting so, I'm willing to work my way up), I just don't understand how people can expect you to work for them for free...IT'S CRAZY?

I feel like my town doesn't understand the importance of this profession and that it is a real job. When you have people working for you for free, it's not like they're gonna show up in time or maybe even show up at all, which is making everything very unprofessional (and that's how I feel about most projects I take on here in this town... I gotta move!). 

I just want to remind you what impact theater, film, music, art, actors, directors, artist have on your/our everyday life!!

• It creates important subjects to discuss
• form debates
• brings people together
• evokes emotions
• influences they way we think and feel about our own lives and encourages us to take a hard look at ourselves, our values and our behavior.
• helps people in similar situations to deal with "it"

The list goes on...

I would want people to respect this occupation for what it is, just as important as any other professions out there. I mean can you imagine a world without, TV, Film, Music, Radio, Theater...? 

The answer is obviously, NO! I hope this made you consider the way you look at my profession. have a great Sunday! 

// Felix

BE OBSERVANT

I'm gonna give you the the two words that can/will change your life as an actor - BE OBSERVANT!  

I'm not gonna write an essay about it, I'm just gonna let you use your imagination to find the meaning of these two words! I've been doing it for the past months and I wish I would have known about this before, because then I would have had even more knowledge. Write everything down, and use it for your advantage, you'll understand what I'm taking about when you are facing it.  

Time flies

(I'll leave the picture to describe have I feel) WHERE... did... the weekend... go, and where did this day go!? Holy cow.. the saying "time flies" really says it all nowadays. I just want it to slow down a bit (I'm trying to enjoy life here... hallo.. before I get old!?)! 

I booked a small acting gig last Thursday (as an extra) in Inga Lindstrom, a german TV film/show. I'm so glad I booked it and got to work with all the amazing people involved. Everything was so professional and everyone were so lovely. I didn't want it to end (as always when I'm on set). I hope I get get back on set really soon, 'cause that's where I feel like I belong! If you're reading this and is a fan of Inga Lindstrom, be sure to look out for a guy, with a yellow and black square-striped shirt dancing (with a beautiful girl) and having dinner at a restaurant - that'll be me.

I learned a lot from this day, not only that I and the people there have more in common than my friends back home. But also that I'm not alone feeling that these small gigs are really enriching. I spoke to  one of the extras about it, that I'm really bad when it comes to auditioning and that these gigs helps me build up that missing confidence. THIS IS a great advice for any young actor out there, GET EXPERIENCE and find ways to get confidence (being and extra is a great way)  

It's Monday today, and as always that makes me feel anxious... I don't know where to start or what to do, even though I have millions of things to do. Today have been "pretty" productive though. I managed to work on my character as the story teller in "the little ghost Godfrey" (which have premier in 3 weeks) so that's all good. I'm really happy with what I've managed to create and bring out of just a story teller, I think people will love him. 
I've also been at the gym (even though the cold is making it REALLY FUCKING HARD TO BREATH), had dinner and had time to listen to the latest episode of "Actors Anonymous Podcast" (My current obsession, IT's GREAT. Go listen to it, it's free on itunes). 
I'm now gonna watch Swedish Idols and then do some research on a sketch I'm currently writing for the script to the gala (Nassjo against Cancer) and last do some meditation before I go to bed. 
Have a great week everyone! 

Update time

YOO, it's your boy Felix Martinsson here (that's the lamest beginning to a blog post I've ever written). 

So what is going on!??

I've been feeling very stressed out lately, probably because I've got a lot coming up (I always take on more than I can handle, even though I always manage to fulfil everything, so that means I can handle it, but under a lot of pressure and stress... hmm.. I guess pushing yourself to do things helps..?).

Here is what's coming up:

1. New children's play about the "little ghost Laban" (We're doing 2 shows every Saturday in the end of the month, rehearsing every Friday. I'm directing and acting, IT'S amazing!).

2. Acting Workshop 2 days in October at a school (I'm gonna have 3-4 different classes with teenagers. If I wasn't clear enough, I'm the coach.)

3. Acting Workshop for people with disabilities (I'm gonna have a group of people with disabilities 90 minutes a week, and coach acting. Really looking forward to that!) 

4. Co-hosting the "Nassjo Cancer Gala" november 7 (all the profit goes to The Pink Ribbon, It's going to be amazing. Not gonna be a typical host, we're gonna spice it up and be a character. REALLY REALLY looking forward to that)

5. The film I shot last year is coming out!! (not sure of a date yet, but it says on IMDb, that it's coming out 2015. And When I spoke to the director,  he said: "this fall".)

I don't know if I've told you that I'm the worst when it comes to sitting still? I love writing and my mind constantly have ideas for Tv Programs, Film scripts, Theater scripts, books, app ideas and Youtube Videos, anything creative. I just can't sit still and focus, I would love to just sit down and be able to write a few chapters for a book, but I just can't. It stresses me out and I get annoyed easily because it takes such a long time for me to find the right words and building the sentences correct... I just keep missing good ideas inside my head.(It's like: Oh I have an Idea... Oh.. I got another idea.. OH WAIT... INCOMING.. another HUGE IDEA!! I just need to remember them and formulate them into readable sentences, which I never manage to do because I forget them, because my vocabulary is SHIT!).

Kids, take notes! I'm gonna give you the best tip on how to increase your vocabulary... READ... READ ANYTHING (especially books)!! So next time your teacher tells you to read a new book, see it as a learning experience (reading can be fun, reading is FUN. I mean you're reading this right now, and this is fun, right?)

Anyway, where was I going with this..? (Ideas, reading, writing...book... oh yeah!) I wanna write a book. But I feel like it's easier for me to write a blog post than to sit down for hours in front of Word and write it there. So my Idea is (I know what you're thinking, "You got a new idea again Felix?" YES I do, did you not read this!? this is the way my mind works!) to write my book here on this blog.

I'll do a chapter every now and then, and when I'm out of chapters and ideas I guess the book is finished. (this isn't going to be something serious, I just feel like I need to release some of what is going on inside my head. And I can assure you, it's crazy, hilarious and thrilling stuff, that I think people would find interesting reading about, hopefully even funny)

Have a great week people! 

// Felix 

Big Game

So It's been a while since I mentioned a film I really enjoyed (and I watch a lot of films). I was watching Big Game the other night and holy COW was I surprised? It was amazing, the visual effect were incredible and the story was hilarious. The Finish kid playing Oskari in the film was brilliant, I can see him having his future all planned out, and I mean who doesn't like Samuel L. Jackson? Some parts of the film was a bit over exaggerated but I thought it worked good with this type of film. I don't think I 've said the word WOW so many times in a movie (I'm barely amazed nowadays by the visual effects but this was incredible). I'm definitely gonna watch Jalmari Helander's (the director) other films and the christmas horror film in specific, it looks just as Bad ass as this one.

 I'm so happy I watched this film and I highly recommend you watch it, but be sure to do your research before you watch it so that you know what your are giving yourself into (it's not for everyone). 

I give it F F F F out of 5

Planning with Coffee

It feels like Sunday, but it's Tuesday... (I miss the cast, they were incredible) I usually work Tuesdays, directing a new play together with 9 young unexperienced actors with a lot of energy. To be honest, THEY were so much better than I was my first time on stage. I'd like to think it's me who taught them lot of good tips and been giving them directions. I want to see them evolve more, such a lovely cast! 

I've been sat here (eating cinnamon buns and drinking coffee the past 30 minutes)  trying to figure ot where to start, I have three videos to film, one vlog to edit and a new website to create, plus I need to update my resume (WHERE DO I START!?).  

I think I want to start with my new Website, not sure how I'll do it but it must happen, it's time for some change! 

BEHIND THE MASK (2015)

"Every super hero lives a double life, but most superheros can control it and never reveal themselves. Steve on the other hand is trying really hard to adjust to this not so very ordinary life. With a worried mother and father who calls every day to check on him and with a strict boss who gives him a hard time and wants him to fail, he is doing the best he can to live the life of both the man behind the mask and the man with the mask." 

PAPERBAG (2015)

"Paperbag is the most annoying closet monster there is, he makes annoying sounds, forgets things and is just VERY annoying in general. He is not like any other  closet monster, he covers his true scary self with a paper bag over his head, and some cloth from the closet to cover his body. All he wants is to be normal and to have a friend and someone to talk with." 

SMASH (2015)

"Issac gets bullied a lot both in school and outside of school. The only thing he wants, is to feel needed and perhaps even loved). And when that opportunity is given to him, he takes it and become SMASH with his anger inside of him and a meat hammer as his weapon he does all the dirty work for Dr. Provsh. No longer the victim, but the bad guy."

Where have you been?

Hi, 
It's been a while. I'm currently reading Zoe Sugg's book (or well, not as I'm writing this post but you get it.. It's really freaking good) and it made me wanna write a post on here. I feel like this is the only way for me to really "spit it out" (word vomit in other words). 

Life is pretty good to be honest. WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN!? you might ask? (or maybe not, the analytics says there are no one reading, and I'm okay with that actually) I'm gonna make a list for you, to make it easy for you to follow up on what you've been missing out on. 

List of thing you missed:
1. I've been to 2 auditions  and sent away 5 self taped audition. 
2. I went to California for 3 weeks (gonna post a lot of photos soon.)San francisco - Santa Barbara - San Diego - LA - Vegas - LA (It was the best thing/experience I've ever done)
3. I've got a job as a... (don't know what to call it really) Director/Acting coach. Where I direct a new play every week throughout July and coach the actors (the teens, who are crazy good and I like them a lot)
4. I did my first ever really really SUPER professional Audition ever, for the TV show Vikings. (watch my Vlog about it HERE...)
5. I've been posting a lot of Vlogs and short teaser/trailers on my channel, and made over 400 subscribers (419 to be exact, and it's F**** amazing, and the response to my videos are surprisingly good, can't thank people enough)

I think that's pretty much it for tonight, I'm about to cuddle up in bed with Zoe's book and read a few more chapters of Girl Online, then go to sleep (and I can hear your what you think "that's a book for girls". But I actually really enjoy it, and I think most guys could enjoy it as well, be open minded and bring your notepad you can actually learn a thing or two. Plus she mention Shakespeare and acting so how could I not like it). A new day in the directors chair awaits me tomorrow, and I'm excited to get creative and see what we can create together before the big show on Saturday. 

(I've totally forgot how to end a blog post... do I say anything or leave a plank space...hmm)

Have a good night! 

Let's talk acting

I'm just about to make my new vlog public on YouTube (Go check it out) and I've had a cup of coffee. What a great morning you think? YES, it is a fantastic morning, even the sun is shining. 

I've made some discoveries about myself these past few days. The first is that I'm too much of an actor, I can't even Video Blog without having another take in case I messed up in the first one, and won't be able to use that clip (Crazy, I KNOW). Second, I've created an inner stress that makes me go nuts when I've been away from set and stage too long, which then have lead to constipation a few times, NOT GOOD(mmhmm...) And I read an article saying you should have a life apart from acting and the industry as well, to be able to make it (very dramatic, but true). And I really see why that is necessary now (I literally live acting, need to change my way of living a bit). Third, I'm obsessed with Shakespeare and his work, don't know what happened there. I just woke up one morning, and started reading Macbeth and now I've read two of his plays, and am about to start a third one. Forth, I'm starting to understand that you need to have variety as an actor in the beginning, and not attache to a specific character/role (In my case, the psycho, villain). I'm about to change that, I just wanna finish my role as Collin in "The Diary of a Psycho Person" first. 

Now, that's some great things to discover about yourself, I've got a lot of (more) work to do. But I'm always up for a challenge. Have a great Saturday, enjoy the lovely weather (if you live where the sun is shining) and don't forget to check out my YouTube Channel. 

XX   

The follow up on "The Psycho Monologue"

I got some great news for you! I'm currently working on the follow up on "The Psycho Monologue", - "The Diary of a Psycho Person" I have no script yet. But the Idea is pretty much ready, just need to sit down and start writing the script. Last week I shot two teasers (to give you a glimpse of how it will look like, not yet released) and I'm about to edit them later. I will also use them when I'm looking for backup, because I wanna do this properly this time. So I'm thinking of using a either "Kick starter" or "Indigogo" which are websites where I can post my project and raise money, get backers and supporters. But there is a lot to do before we get there so I'm really trying to figure out how to get this started still (at least I got the teasers and the idea).

So if you haven't seen The Psycho Monologue, go check that out, and let me know what you think, so far I've got great response, and almost 2000 views. Really looking forward to this, and since I've now got time and money, I just want to start the project! 

Stay tuned for more updates... BYE!!!

The Walking Dead

There are two things I could talk about referring to this title. The show "The Walking Dead" or the fact that I'm walking dead (let's do both). I feel so tired, this is why I don't like to party. I feel like it f**** up my brain. I had a great time last night, it's just I don't like the day after, and I didn't even drink that much... (not a big fan of alcohol). I rather watch a good film and have a bite, might propose that next time. 

Anyway, I just watched an episode of The Walking Dead, and holy shit was it good! they're really spicing things up, I've never felt this much emotions whilst watching any other show. It's a roller coaster for sure, either you cry, or you laugh or you want to beat the shit out of character. What I mean is, It's so so so so good! I wish I could be involved in a show like this! hopefully one day I will. I mean the production, crew, cast is just phenomenal. I'm gonna continue watching some shows and just relax now, and I hope you have a great Sunday as well! 

First of all, there is definitely something going on inside of my body (my stomach hurts in a weird way, So definitely gonna have that checked out first thing Monday) second of all, I now know exactly what material I need and to have planned and ready for my tour through Sweden when I'm auditioning for all the acting programs, YAY! Things are going good (if you ask me anyway, my mother on the other hand, don't think she thinks I'm doing anything... which is really sad)! 

I've got 3 videos to edit tomorrow, one Vlog from this week and two teasers to my follow up "The Psycho Monologue" (which has reached 2 K view, ALMOST) "The Diary of a Psycho Person", so I'm gonna call it the night and get some sleep. I also have to study the monologue I'm currently working on and lots of other stuff. 

Head over to my channel and watch my vlogs! 

  

Beautiful day

Seriously! It's really nice outside, just got home from the gym and a walk in the park, and I'm about to start the intense part where I study until I can't read more (I'm also having a cup of coffee to get into character).  

So what's up, you might think (if not, then I don't know why you are here.) I've been busy networking, emailing, building relationships on YouTube and studying Macbeth (I've also been super busy planning the trip to California, reading a book, watching film, YouTube and the new season of House of Cards but let's not talk about that out loud ) and drum roll please... I manage to finally get a job for the summer (acting related), as coach, acting coach/director/leader (teacher?), It's gonna be awesome I'm so excited. So I have to plan a lot, and to be honest I've got lots of plans already, just need to present them and check with my boss first. 
Other than that, I'm waiting (and I HATE waiting) for a lot of callbacks, I don't think I'm lying if I say +20 callbacks. I really do hope they want me, I've got so much to offer, and after reading this book by Peter Barkworth I feel even more ready. It's a brilliant book, I highly recommend you read it, "About Acting". 

There you go, a little update on what's going on, please make sure to visit my YouTube Channel, since I'm uploading a lot of stuff, Video blogs and other more acting related things! 

Have a great Sunday everyone!!  

Not this time either...

I'm not gonna lie, every time I get the "bad news" that I didn't get the call back, all the energy just disappears. It's so frustrating, but I know that this is part of the job. Sometimes you'll get a yes and sometimes a no. I always, almost touch the finish line... Then I have to go back to the starting line and get ready once again. It's really exhausting. (And with a mother who doesn't support my career choice a shit it is ever worse, I can see how she's like "oh well, jet another time") 

The good thing though, is that I've still got one more production company I haven't heard back from jet. So Hopefully I get the "News" when I get back from London. ALWAYS, remember why you started!!!  

Happy Valentine's Day

It's that day again, I'm not against it, but I'm not that big of a fan either. I just think there shouldn't have to be a day for this, showing love to someone is something you should do every day of the year. But sure GO for it, I hope you have a great Valentine's Day.

:) 

I've spent my morning sending emails to Open calls, and casting directors so far (that's my LOVE). And I might have to book the tickets to LA today as well, because apparently they price grows every day... And I'm going to London next Friday. I travel so much nowadays (I'm adventurous, I know... really I'm not!). 

And btw I just got home from Stockholm as well, and I might have to go to Gothenburg soon. (because I'm finally getting callbacks, so grateful!) I'm never home, but that's the real life of an actor, might as well get used to it. 

The mind of a thinker

"I constantly feel like I have to choose between making friends, getting a girlfriend or becoming an actor."

"why can't people see me for who I am, not for something I'm trying to be" 

"Is that even a word??" 

"breath in....... "

"I need to prove to people I am what I want to be" 

"breath out..........." 

When anxiety catches up to you, and you don't know where to turn, look or walk. That's when your mind starts to fuck with you, seriously I sometimes feel like a total wreck. And why does he write this on here you might think to yourself (or if you're with someone ask your friend). Or if it's you again Felix reading this, go to bed!
The truth is, this is something I should have done a long time ago. Since I'm studying the art of acting and performing, I've learnt you gotta be up-front with yourself, don't hide things. You gotta be able to let things out, be open, let your emotions out. It's okay to cry... everyone does it, even guys. Our society is fucked up! I can't cry or barely show any kind of emotions other than happiness outside of my room. Because you're not allowed, according to society, (or is it just Sweden). 
What I mean is, I want to be able to show let's say; that I'm sad sometimes without having to hide behind a mask. It's important as an actor to unblock these obstacles, to be able to portray these feelings with credibility. 

With that said, I'll let you know, that every time I go on stage, in front of the camera or upload something new on YouTube I'm afraid what people will think of me (I don't show that, because I'm a good actor and I take on that mask. But inside I'm scared to death), because at this stage of your career, everything you do is weird. What I do on YouTube is what most people would describe as weird, because I'm not famous (But you see, Michael Keaton or Ellen or Jimmy was once "not famous"). 

I've spent all day thinking if I'm ready to expose my inner comedian, or if I should play it safe, do another psycho monologue. But then I'll never evolve and become what I aim to be, A good actor. So I'm gonna take a risk here, and see what's gonna happen, I do actually enjoy playing "Charlie Watson" because he is such an up-front and honest person (very different from me). I guess that's why I'm so drawn to him - not because I'm an honest person, but because I am not.

I do NOT, want people to feel sorry for me or anything, because that's what I can't take (have people give me that look, UUGH). I just want to be able to feel what I feel (be open about it), and not have to think about what other people think of it.

Super Bowl Sunday

Today is the day!!!! As much as I love acting, I LOVE football. And even better, my team is in the Super Bowl again. The Seahawks have so many inspiring players in their team, and they play with such a passion. I really think we can win this SB as well as last year! It's a big event and game something you just can't miss! Even though I gotta study the Macbeth monologue, but I mean that's what the commercial breaks are for.

The short story about Felix

This is a short story about a young man in his early twenties (21 to be exact). His name is Felix, which mean happy and lucky. Unfortunately he isn't that very lucky nor happy. If he was lucky, he’d won a million dollars last time he bought that lottery ticket, he also would've had parents that supported his career choice and didn't tell him: “You will get kidnapped, tortured maybe even killed!” every time he left the nest to go to an audition (They might be serial killers or people working with trafficking. I’m talking about the casting directors), because they know that’ll worry him and maybe make him stay at home instead of going to that audition. Which then would lead to him not becoming an actor. And Felix would be happy if someone just gave him a chance of proving he is an actor about to bloom and become something big. He would also be really happy if people could treat him with the same respect he does, and not act as if he is just some outcast (just because he happens to live in Nässjö, Småland and not in the big cities). Other than trying to stand up for his name, Felix likes to read books, watch movies, go to the gym and hang out with friends. But that’s when he’s not busy working on a new short film or monologue to tape and upload to YouTube to stay involved in the business. As this might come as a shock (referring to that gloomy story I just told you, if that’s how you thought of it), Felix can actually be funny, very polite, lion-hearted and easy to work with.

Just give him a call (+46 722225533), or send him an email (felixmartinsson@hotmail.com) and he will answer you anytime, in fact he is waiting by his phone right at this very moment, (most young adults are).